Toddler Behavior Problems?

If you are having toddler behavior problems, the question and answer below may shed some light on your own situation.

Read through other questions and answers in the rest of the parenting advice area. Feel free to contact me with your own toddler-related problems.

Question:
I have a 3 year old and I babysit one who will be 3 in three weeks. Both are boys.

My child is heaven sent and never saw the terible twos. The one I babysit on the other hand is so bad. He hits, screams, breaks my son's toys. You say "Don't do that" - he does.

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Both have been potty trained for three months. Now he has pooped at nap time, played in it and thrown it across the room. One week later he pooped in the bathtub and turned on the water. The very next dayhe sits there on his riding toy and poops his pants while looking at me andlaughing.

I don't how much more I can take. Please give me some advice on where I am going wrong or is it his Mom? When she is not at work she takes him to Nannies. Does he need attention?


Answer:
In a word, yes. From what you say about the lack of attention his mother gives him, it sounds like he is desperate to feel significant and be noticed - this is perfectly normal with toddlers, but he is taking it to extremes because he doesn't get the love and attention he needs at home.

Have a look at the page on attention seeking for more about this.

Have you looked at the other questions in this section? As some of the solutions might work with this boy.


I have to say that he has so many toddler behavior problems that it would not surprise me if you cannot resolve these issues alone - and why should you??


I think you need to talk to the mom. Let me repeat it loud and clear: you should not be expected to manage this sort of behavior on your own. In your situation I would explain that he is really challenging, and that you need to work together to help him control himself.


If she is not cooperative, then I would consider stopping babysitting this boy if at all possible. There's no shame in it, especially if it's affecting your son. Everyone struggles with toddler behavior problems, but you seem to have more than your fair share to deal with.