Funny Quotes
About Toddlers

Toddler Ideas Hints and Tips
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Why do we need funny quotes about toddlers? Because being able to laugh about the experience of bringing up a child is a skill as important as changing your first dirty nappy.

So put your feet up and read these quotes about children who haven't yet learned the meaning of the phrases 'Come here', 'Wait a minute' and 'I'm knackered'...but use them liberally anyway.

I have also found some thought-provoking quotes and added these.

Raising Toddlers

A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills. She has fourteen kids but she really doesn’t care.

It takes a village to raise a child.
African Proverb


You can learn many things from children.How much patience you have, for instance.
Franklin P Jones

Insanity is hereditary: You can get it from your children.
Sam Levinson

It is not a bad thing that children should occasionally, and politely, put parents in their place.

Talking the Talk

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed.


In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn’t danced on television.
Erma Bombeck

Carrots do something for children’s vision. Kids can spot carrots no matter how you disguise them.


There never was a child so lovely but, that his mother was glad to get him to sleep.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Potty Training

One year, I’d completely lost my bearings trying to follow potty training instruction from a psychiatric expert. I was stuck on step one, which stated without irony: ‘Before you begin, remove all stubbornness from the child’.
Mary Kay Blakely

Wise Children...

Children are naturally content because they don't know any different. It's the knowledge of difference that breeds discontent - and it's when you finally realise that difference makes no difference that you can reclaim contentment.
Guy Browning

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