Attention Seeking Behaviour
What To Do & Not Do About It
Does your toddler's attention seeking behaviour drive you up the wall? Before you tear your hair out, read on for some vital information to help you cope with this extremely common problem.
What Exactly Is It?The answer is any behaviour that happens to make you give your child your full attention. Obvious, isn't it? Maybe so, but have you ever asked yourself why they want a parental captive audience? It is astounding how many parents fail to understand that grabbing your attention is a specific strategy that your child uses for very specific reasons.
What Causes Attention Seeking Behaviour?Toddlerhood is a time of huge developmental changes. As adults, we are quick to talk out our stress - 'I'm under such pressure at work with my new promotion...we're moving house - what a nightmare!' etc etc.
Young children don't know how to express it, but they too are under stress, albeit a different kind.
The experience of developing - social behaviour such as sharing
- toilet training
- physical coordination
- language
are all really hard work for any toddler. All this happens in such a short space of time. And let's not forget that children of this age have absolutely zero life experience to fall back on when they slip up.
Who or what do we adults turn to when we are stressed?
Comfort.
For adults, there is a wide variety of comfort to choose from - a sympathetic friend, a night under the duvet with a good film, chocolate, wine, parenting chat rooms - it's all there at our fingertips.Q: Who do toddlers turn to for comfort? A: You.
Want to know more about why toddlers crave adult attention, even when it comes in the form of shouting and worse? Download my ebook Positive Toddler Discipline today and find out.
Why Telling Off Doesn't WorkNow you know that this behaviour has a very understandable cause, keeping this in mind is really important. There is no point getting angry with your child when s/he starts playing up for the sake of it. Because, guess what? Losing your temper, shouting or spanking will all backfire and make the problem worse.
Attention Seeking Behaviour StrategiesFortunately there is a much more effective strategy at your disposal: ignore your toddler's Oscar winning performance. Go to ignoring problem behaviour for full details. There are lots of ideas on this page that will make both you and your child more happy and confident together.
Return from Attention Seeking Behaviour to Toddler Discipline
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